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 Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Wednesday Poetry Prompts: 020
Posted by Robert
As mentioned in an earlier post, Southwest Ohio was beat up by a wind storm that had hurricane force winds. Earlier in the weekend, I assured my sons that Ohio never experiences hurricanes (we just have twisters to contend with usually), but by Sunday evening daddy was proved wrong (once again).
Anyway, for this week's prompt, I want you to write a poem about something that would make you happy. For me, that would be getting electricity at home again (been without since early Sunday afternoon). For someone else, that may be a trip to Paris or a visit from a loved one or a teleportation machine (with the gas prices these days, it would sure come in handy).
Here's my silly attempt for the week:
"Electricity"
Without you, I'm propping a flashlight's glare into the corner above the shower to clean myself in almost warm water before charging my cell phone in the car on my way into work. I am sorry I took you for granted. Please come back soon.
Personal Updates | Poetry Prompts
Wednesday, September 17, 2008 3:55:50 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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First Ever Fake Bio Contest Winner and Other Finalists
Posted by Robert
Okay, I've been in hiding recently because so many poets have been hounding me over who is the winner of the first ever fake bio contest on Poetic Asides. The great thing about this contest is that writers didn't need to have any "real" credits to enter--just a great imagination of what they'd like to have in their bio notes. That said, the competition was fierce--with many entrants owning impressive "real" bios.
Anyway, the judging was difficult, especially as I got closer and closer to narrowing down the field to 8 finalists from which to pick the winner. To build the suspense and share some of the fake bios I found most interesting, here are the 7 finalists who did not win:
Pris Campbell's poetry book, Sucky Relationships, was just turned into an award-winning movie, directed by Clint Eastwood. She will be featured on Dr. Phil and Oprah where she'll moderate participant's arguments about which partner sucked the most. She is currently being sued by all six of her ex-husbands who demand parts in the movie as their award. She lives with her pet monkey on an island off of Maine where she's hard at work on a sequel. Jib-Jab plans to spearhead a drive to make her poet laureate for 'making poetry relevant to the people' again.
Pris Campbell |camprisAT NOSPAMbellsouth dot net
*****
Kellian Angelou is famous and well-known for winning the Pullet's Surprise, the No Bell Piece Prize, and the Mack Arthur Genie Grant for her poetry collection exploring the uncertainty of scales, The Waistland. The Waistland is a corset of sonnets dealing with the tragic difficulty of being a size 14 in a world of zeros. Kellian received her MFA from the I-Owe-ya Writers Workshop. She currently lives with her wild emu, Walt, in the Northwest.
Kelli Agodon |kelliAT NOSPAMagodon dot com
*****
Caili Wilk has been awarded the Emily Dickinson accolade for her upcoming work titled, “I am so old”. At age 32, this will be her first award for poetry; however as a teenager she received a bronze certificate for her entry into the middle school song contest. Miss Wilk is most well known for her attempt to break the world record for typing out the letter P on a keyboard; however, after 5,328,685 times, she collapsed muttering “I need to pee”. Inconsequently, she retired to her bathroom, and has not been seen in public since developing severe typophobia.
Caili Wilk |cailiwilkAT NOSPAMgmail dot com
*****
Robert McDermott was intended to be the reincarnation of Robert Lowell but owing to a clerical error is actually the reincarnation of John Berryman. His poetry is quite remarkable and is easily the best on his ward. He is currently writing an opera about oranges and in his next life he wants to be a Shakespearean villain. His latest collection 'In conversation with Kilgore Trout' has attracted wide praise and is available in spirit everywhere.
Robert McDermott |robertmcdermottAT NOSPAMgmail dot com
*****
Odoacer Pinkyring Moses de la Salle Cuthbert-Jones is that weird guy who lives in the van parked across the street from your house. He is allergic to everything, especially air and water. His most recent book, the title of which is unpronounceable in any human language, spent 30 seconds at the top of the best seller list in the Autonomous Republic of Erewhon. One day he will destroy you all.
Matthew Falk |mdfalkAT NOSPAMsvsu dot edu
*****
Jonathan Pinnock is the author of "Apathy: A 21st Century Manifesto". He'd tell you more about himself if he could be bothered.
Jonathan Pinnock |jonAT NOSPAMjpassoc dot co dot uk
*****
Shaindel Beers, the once promising young poet, has decided after reading many literary journals, including this one, that mediocrity is the way to go. Obviously no one was brilliant enough to understand her allusions to the classical mythologies of ancient civilizations, her personal theories of metaphysics, or her unique insight into the human condition. Instead, journals have elected to publish her drunken scrawlings written on napkins at dive bars, which she then drunk types when she comes home alone from happy hours at various establishments. The other nights, little writing gets done.
Shaindel Beers |shaindelrAT NOSPAMyahoo dot com
*****
All of these were great, but the first ever winner cracked me up--and got bonus points, because writers could actually submit a similar bio note without stretching the truth. As a result, Jessy Randall will receive a free copy of the 2009 Poet's Market. Congratulations, Jessy!
Here's her winning entry:
Jessy Randall has read poems in the Iowa Review, Ploughshares, the Paris Review, the New Yorker, and The Best American Poetry 1999, 2003, and 2007.
Jessy Randall |jessyrandallAT NOSPAMyahoo dot com
General | Personal Updates | Poetry News | Poetry Publishing | Poets
Wednesday, September 17, 2008 3:30:22 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Interview, no power, and other fun updates!
Posted by Robert
Belinda Subraman recently interviewed me on her blog. She has quite a few interviews listed on her blog with various poetry-related people and others. The cool thing about this interview is that it's in audio. Check it out at http://belinda_subraman.podomatic.com/entry/eg/2008-09-13T08_02_04-07_00.
In the interview, I mention S.A. Griffin, Amanda Oaks, James Tate, my wife, an ex-girlfriend, my past with F+W Media, my future with F+W Media, my writing, my submissions, etc. (Sounds like a lot of me-me-me, but hopefully there is some value for you-you-you as well.)
*****
Also, if it seems like it's been a little quiet over here, it's because I was busy last week--AND most of Southwest Ohio was without power Sunday afternoon into this morning. In fact, my house in Dayton is still without power--and I believe more than 500,000 people in the Cincinnati-area alone are still in the dark. But F+W Media is back up and running today. Yay!
*****
Finally, we mentioned the Fake Bio Contest in the interview mentioned above. I've got the list whittled down to 8 fake bios and will attempt to name a winner before I leave this afternoon. Thanks for being patient with me! General | Personal Updates
Tuesday, September 16, 2008 4:25:28 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Thursday, September 11, 2008
Having Fun With Bad Poetry
Posted by Robert
Brian Klems (of Writer's Digest fame) brought the following thread to my attention from the WD.com forums: http://forum.writersdigest.com/forums/thread-view.asp?tid=19564&start=1
First post: "I have this gift you see to write very bad poetry Try as I might It's something I just can't fight So I write stuff you wouldn't read to a tree"
-wondo
Starting up in July, this thread is still going strong (with more than 500 responses to date). While other random forms have entered into the chain, the thread seems to rely mostly on limericks. So if you want to play around with a group of other writers, here's your chance.
*****
Also, Amy Barlow Liberatore proposed on my Facebook page that we all try writing "bad haiku." (She mentioned that Iain Douglas Kemp was partially responsible for inspiring her.) So if you want to start writing bad haiku, feel free to post in the comments below.
General | Personal Updates | Poetic Forms | Poetry Prompts | Poets
Thursday, September 11, 2008 8:24:01 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Wednesday Poetry Prompts: 019
Posted by Robert
One of my favorite prompts way back in April during the PAD Challenge was when I asked people to write a poem where they slip into the skin of someone or something else. With that prompt in mind, I think I've come up with another fun one that is somewhat similar.
For this week's prompt, I want you to first come up with a title that is: "(Blank) is (Blank)".
So, possible titles could be:
"Darth Vader is a sith lord" "Santa Claus is real" "Rocks are not scissors" "Godzilla is a ballerina"
After you come up with a great "Blank is blank" title, write a poem that corresponds with that title.
Here's my attempt for the day:
"Your name is astronaut"
When you were born, the fishermen released their fish back into the sea; the politicians quit giving speeches; the editors set down their red pens; the lead singers dropped their mics; pundits squabbled no more; critics patted each other on their backs; parents let their children stay up late and watch television; children listened to their parents; hawks stopped hunting field mice; and everyone gave each other high-fives and sang songs of hope for a planet where everyone can be different without stepping on each others' toes. Poetry Prompts
Wednesday, September 10, 2008 3:26:47 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Thursday, September 04, 2008
Fundamentals of Poetry Writing
Posted by Robert
Just want to remind people they can sign up for my Fundamentals of Poetry Writing course offered on WritersOnlineWorkshops.com by going to: http://www.writersonlineworkshops.com/retail/courses.aspx?r=fundamentals-of-poetry-writing.
It should be a fun and informative course that gives poets a chance to write some new poems and receive feedback from peers and myself. The online course runs from September 18 to December 10.
Also, keep a look out for an Advanced Poetry Writing course I'll be heading up on the site from November 6 to December 17.
*****
And as long as I'm at it, might as well mention that you can (and should) sign up for the free monthly Poet's Market e-newsletter at www.poetsmarket.com. This monthly message is put together by me and includes some information that is not offered on this blog. General | Personal Updates | Poetry Craft Tips
Thursday, September 04, 2008 8:48:15 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Wednesday, September 03, 2008
Wednesday Poetry Prompts: 018
Posted by Robert
I don't know. Maybe it's the diet I've recently put myself on. Maybe it's the approach of autumn festivals and the thought of funnel cakes and soft pretzels. Or maybe it's just the poets I've been reading. Regardless, it feels as if I've been reading a lot of poems recently dealing with food-food-food (yummy, yummy food!).
So with that kind of introduction, it should come as little surprise that this week's prompt is to write a poem that involves food in some way. You can make food the main protagonist or give food a cameo. Perhaps, you could even make food the antagonist. Hmm...
Anyway, here's my attempt for the day:
"Food Sestina"
Though I like apples, I love pears and have always fancied peaches, especially with cottage cheese. In the summer, I crave bell peppers mixed with some light pasta-- maybe a glass of apple juice,
though I'd also drink the juice left in my bowl of sliced pears, because what better with pasta? Mmm... and for dessert, some hot peach cobbler, though not like the hot peppers at the spice shop; those require cheese
to cool the mouth. But maybe cheese would go well with grape juice, yes, and some jalapeno peppers-- juicy in their own way. After, a pair of freshly picked peaches would hit the spot. Not pasta,
or maybe yes to pasta after all. Some ricotta cheese on the sauce. On the side, peaches halved and a bit of cranberry juice. Of course, my favored pears and some sweet, sweet peppers.
But then I start thinking, pepperoni pizza? Hmm... the thought of pasta sauce slapped on dough, then pare back an abundance of melty cheese along with some of that blue juice drink I had as a kid--or even peach-
flavored pop. That would be peachy. But if I want to salt and pepper my food, I should not think such juicy thoughts. Instead, I should forget pasta, and focus on some breaded cheese sticks. Then, and only then, can I spare
myself the pears and peaches. I will be all cheesed and peppered, ready to juice my pasta.
Personal Updates | Poetry Prompts
Wednesday, September 03, 2008 3:50:09 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Tuesday, September 02, 2008
Exclusive Interview With Poet Sandra Beasley
Posted by Robert
This interview has been a work-in-progress since May of this year, even if Sandra Beasley wasn't in the loop on it. When I was in Los Angeles earlier this year for BookExpo America, I brought along a copy of Hotel Amerika for reading purposes and was floored by a poem about a translator by a poet I'd never heard of named Sandra Beasley. I even read that and another Beasley poem to my wife Tammy over the phone that same morning and mentioned that I need to hunt her down for an interview. But then I got busy and kept not getting around to it until Martha Silano mentioned Beasley in a recent Poetic Asides interview. That gave me the extra shove I needed, and so there's the history leading up to this posting.
Sandra Beasley won the 2007 New Issues Poetry Prize for her book Theories of Falling, selected by Marie Howe. It was released in April of this year by New Issues and has already received much praise. She received her MFA from American University and serves on the staff of The American Scholar. Beasley has also won numerous awards, including fellowships to Vermont Studio Center, Virginia Center for the Creative Arts, the Jenny McKean Moore Workshop, the Indiana University Writers' Conference, and the Millay Colony for the Arts.
Here's the opening poem to Theories of Falling, which was also cited by Martha Silano in her interview with Poetic Asides (and originally appeared in 32 Poems):
Cherry Tomatoes
Little bastards of vine. Little demons by the pint. Red eggs that never hatch, just collapse and rot. When
my mom told me to gather their grubby bodies into my skirt, I'd cry. You and your father, she'd chide--
the way, each time I kicked and wailed against sailing, my dad shook his head, said You and your mother.
Now, a city girl, I ease one loose from its siblings, from its clear plastic coffin, place it on my tongue.
Just to try. The smooth surface resists, resists, and erupts in my mouth: seeds, juice, acid, blood
of a perfect household. The way, when I finally went sailing, my stomach was rocked from inside
out. Little boat, big sea. Handful of skinned sunsets.
*****
What are you currently up to?
As readers of my blog know, a few months back I began writing sestinas, invariably between the hours of midnight and 5 AM. I've always had a soft spot for the form, and the drafts were a way of giving myself a break from my second book manuscript. What started as mere linguistic jigsaw-puzzling has now taken on a life of its own: in October Black Warrior Review will publish Bitch and Brew, all sestinas, as part of their chapbook series. So now I am putting together two manuscripts—one in free verse, I Was the Jukebox, and a formal one called (for now) Count the Waves. Both will circulate to publishers beginning this fall.
I've lived in DC since coming up for my MFA at American University, and I grew up in northern Virginia. This is home. So I've taken on service commitments to the Writer's Center, and the Arts Club of Washington, to host readings and improve outreach. There's something immensely satisfying to me about connecting people with common goals and a love of poetry. I've also been thrilled to start contributing to my hometown paper, the Washington Post, as a periodic columnist for their "XX Files" feature in the Sunday Magazine.
You've had fellowships to Vermont Studio Center, Virginia Center for the Creative Arts, the Jenny McKean Moore Workshop, the Indiana University Writers' Conference, and the Millay Colony for the Arts. First, what's your secret to success? Second, how have these fellowships benefited you and your work?
A lot of the opportunities I have had come from just putting stamps on envelopes and getting the darn applications out there. Relentlessly, and with cavalier disregard of the (many, many) rejections that will come your way (or at least, they come my way). You have to make the system as assembly line as possible—go ahead and prepare a generic bio note, c.v., cover letter, project description—though, of course, tailor to the individual application before you send.
Whenever I get the slightest inclination to actually fill out an application (or for that matter, send out a journal submission), I drop whatever else I'm doing and honor the impulse. Even if I'm at work. Even if I'm on deadline. You always have to prioritize the poetry, because no one will do it for you.
Theories of Falling was pretty much born at the Millay Colony—at least twenty of the pages were written there, and I moved thumb-tacked copies around on the wall of my studio until I found the manuscript's order. I love a colony atmosphere: the escape from the city to a rural setting; interaction with fellow artists (painters tend to be my favorites); the fact that you can spend a day going barefoot, reading, and drinking red wine, and that's accepted as part of the process. I would be a colony-hopper if I didn't love DC so much.
Do you have any sort of routine to both your writing and submission efforts?
I try to be as systematic as possible in terms of sending out, by conceptualizing "submission packets" of 4-5 poems each: poems that offset each other well, that advance a certain theme or stylistic gesture. I'll match a packet with whatever I think the editors at that particular magazine will like best. It makes me nervous if I don't have things out at at least three journals at any given time. As you can probably guess from that statement, I prefer places that consider simultaneous submissions. As someone who has worked at a number of magazines, I just don't see any reason not to be open to simultaneous.
As for a routine to my writing schedule…can't say I have one. Sometimes I draft every day for a month, sometimes I go three months without writing a thing. Mostly I draft on my laptop, but I use longhand and legal pads too. I like a variety of settings, so I might start work in my downstairs studio and then move to my bedroom rocking chair; sometimes I write on the balcony, sometimes in a bar. I am 100% night owl, though, and would happily always write between midnight and 3 AM. It's a shame that schedule isn't compatible with the rest of the world.
The poems in Theories of Falling often feel embedded in relationships, either between family members or lovers. Do you find digging into relationships makes for more engaging reading?
Mining what's around you is practically inevitable, particularly for the first book. Young writers have been using the same bildungsroman arc since the days of the German enlightenment, and one of the things you hear over and over in MFA programs—"write what you know"—does nothing to challenge that. Which is just fine, as long as the craft is there and the writer has the discipline to then move on. I love Theories of Falling, but it would be a disappointment if I were digging into those same emotional dynamics three books from now. You do what you can with the material, and then you find something new.
Included in Theories of Falling is "Allergy Girl," a long poem (or series of poems?), about your real-life experiences growing up with chronic and severe food allergies. Could you discuss your feelings on how autobiographical you like to make your poems?
"Allergy Girl" offers the most-straight fact of anything in the book. I'd feel comfortable calling them autobiographical, which I would hesitate to do for any other poems. I think fidelity to fact in poetry is overrated, a belief that is to the unending consternation of my loved ones. Poets are always heightening and fracturing facts to get at a lyric or philosophical "truth." But judging from reader response—and when the book came out, I heard over and over about this series in particular —it is useful for the "Allergy Girl" poems to be understood as "truthful," because they offer perspective on a medical condition that might be of comfort or liberation to someone else trying to write about their health issues. Plus, how could I pass up the chance to say yes, I really was the girl in that bed-of-nails episode of Mondo Magic?
My new work is flagrantly un-biographical, playing with persona and surrealism. The jukebox speaks. The orchid speaks. The world war speaks. I go on blind dates with dead Greek heroes. My family much prefers these poems.
You recently hosted a poetry reading in your apartment. An interview you conducted with Henry Taylor while you were at the University of Virginia led to you being invited to get your MFA at American University. How important do you feel community is for a poet?
I respect the specter of the hermit-poet, who does not want to do any meeting or greeting. But I can't empathize at all, and there is a very proud tradition of poets who cultivate community. Henry Taylor fits that mold, as does Ethelbert Miller here in DC, or Lisa Spaar at the University of Virginia. So often we send our work off into the void, publishing in little journals no one ever sees. If I can make the void a little less echo-ey, whether by hosting readings in my living room or introducing people, I will. And I wouldn't give up those 3 AM conversations on the last night of the AWP conference for anything.
You have a very nice website and blog. What do you see as the main benefits of having these?
Honestly? My website started because of "Sandra Beasley and the Spaz Rats," my internet doppelganger who is a renowned expert on alternative medicine for rodents. I am not making this up. Her name was already all over the web, and I knew unless I actively established my own identity, there were going to be some confused Googlers in the poetry world. So I use a very rudimentary WYSIWYG editor, and try to update the site two times a month with readings and recent publications. I haven't gotten any inquiries about using magnets to treat a rat with a sprained ankle, so I guess my initial goal has been met.
The blog began on a whim, because the aforementioned very rudimentary HTML editor makes casual website updates a pain. I wanted to be able to easily post news, random thoughts in the first person, snapshots of inspiring visual art, etc. It amazes me that totally organic, active, palpable communities of poet-bloggers have formed just in the last three years. In most cases I have "met" poets I never would have known otherwise, leading to some invaluable connections in the real world at conferences or colonies. In some cases fellow bloggers are local folk that I never get a chance to see; at least we can keep tabs on each other, and trade a periodic encouraging note.
Who are you currently reading?
I came back from the July Sewanee Writer's Conference with a stack of books by fellow participants. Fiction by Margo Rabb and Jason Ockert; poetry by Cecily Parks, Katrina Vandenberg, Kimberly Johnson, Philip White. Mark Strand's essays on the paintings of Edward Hopper. And, um, eight more. Outside those: Corinna A-Maying the Apocalypse, by Darcie Dennigan—that is what I am literally reading this second, and it is knocking my socks off. Also sestinas, wherever I can find them.
If you could pass on only one piece of advice to other poets, what would it be?
Read your contemporary poets, ideally in the venue of literary journals. That's where the heart of today's work is beating. So often poets decide a particular school is "not my thing" based not on what this generation is doing with the tenets of that school, but based on what the canonical style has been. The poetry world should be a lot more permeable than that.
*****
For a lot more on Sandra Beasley, including information on her book Theories of Falling, her blog, other interviews, reviews, etc., I suggest you check out her website at www.sandrabeasley.com.
Personal Updates | Poet Interviews | Poetry Publishing | Poets
Tuesday, September 02, 2008 4:48:40 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Friday, August 29, 2008
Everyone have a great weekend!
Posted by Robert
It's Labor Day weekend here in the States, so I get a 3-day weekend with my sons and family reunions on both Sunday (in Northwest Indiana) and Monday (in Southwest Ohio). Woo-hoo!
Also, I want to remind y'all that the deadline for the Fake Bio Note contest is drawing near. So before you get too busy to enter, I suggest you go over, take a look at a few and then take a stab at entering your own fake bio note. It's free--and if yours is selected as the winner, you'll get a free copy of 2009 Poet's Market.
You must add your fake bio note to that actual post, though. So to make it easy on you, here's the URL for that post: http://blog.writersdigest.com/poeticasides/Fake+Bio+Note+Contest.aspx
Besides that, be safe and have fun this weekend!
General | Personal Updates | Poets
Friday, August 29, 2008 7:59:48 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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 Thursday, August 28, 2008
Poetry FAQs: Is it easier to get published online than in print?
Posted by Robert
Well, I just finished my annual bookstore tour for Market Books of Southwest Ohio (thanks to Joseph Beth in Cincy and Books & Co. in Dayton!), and I found it interesting that this same question was asked at both locations by different groups of writers: Is it easier to get published online than in print?
The assumption I think most writers (poets included) make is that online is somehow an easier route to getting published. But I don't think that's necessarily true. Online or off, there is still an editor (or group of editors) looking for quality work, usually with a certain aesthetic in mind whether that be formal verse, narrative, experimental, or some other type of style.
A few years ago, one could make the argument that there were more writers submitting to print publications than online publications. However, with the global reach of established online sites and the limited print runs of literary journals, that pendulum may be swinging the other way.
It should also be noted that as online sites, such as The Pedestal and Boxcar Review, come up with money to pay writers there's less of a resistance among writers to publish their work in one place over another. After all, what's even better than getting your work published? Getting your work published and getting paid for it.
So anyway, here's the short answer I give to writers at bookstores and conferences when they ask if it is easier to get published online than in print:
No. Personal Updates | Poetry FAQs | Poetry Publishing | Poets
Thursday, August 28, 2008 7:23:28 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00)
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