Script Notes by Chad Gervich

Open WGA Meeting This Week: Reality & Game Show Writers Unite!

Chad — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 22:20:09 GMT

Hey, everyone--

As you know, I've been a vocal supporter and cheerleader of the Writers Guild's efforts to organize reality and unscripted (ha!) TV. This isn't a cause that concerns only reality writers... it's a fight for the rights of writers in all mediums. SO...

Tomorrow night, the WGA is holding an open introductory meeting for new members and anyone interested in joining the fight. If you're in LA and would like to come, the WGA is providing dinner... (and free parking!)...

Here's all the info... hope you can make it!

WHEN: Thursday, November 20, 8:00 p.m.
WHERE: Writers Guild, west - 7000 West Third Street, Los Angeles, CA 90048
RSVP (or questions): talbert@wga.org

ALFRE WOODARD SPEAKS AT WGA RALLY AT FREMANTLE MEDIA

READER QUESTION: What are the Chronological "Goalposts" for Becoming a TV Writer?

Chad — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 18:35:49 GMT

Hey, folks—

Today’s reader question comes from E. Daniels, who addresses an issue which, I think, plagues almost every writer in Hollywood, myself included. E Daniels, take it away…

"There are certainly a number of factors involved in getting discovered or 'making it' (fate, talent, luck, hard work, etc.) How long does the average writer take to get staffed? Already that sounds like a question without any one answer.

"But I'm trying to be realistic about my life, and I just thought if I don't see real progress in three years I would have to re-evaluate what I am doing in Los Angeles. But then I realized I don't even know what 'real progress' would look like. I certainly don't expect to be staffed on a show in just three years. And really it seems that two years or twenty, you don't really get closer to getting staffed, you are either staffed or not. Kind of like being pregnant - there is no halfway.

"But then I think, well there is no halfway to being pregnant, but your chances go up by having sex, right? So, metaphorically speaking, what is 'having sex' to a writer? Is it networking and being a great assistant? Is it improving your craft to the point that someone has to take notice? And obviously the question 'when do you give up on a dream?' is loaded and different for each person. (I mean, no one wants to give up on a dream, but you can have other dreams, too - like a steady job and health insurance in a city you like, for instance.)

"Okay, I'll stop with the rambling and boil it down to this: in the interest of making an informed decision (and part of being informed is knowing that it is so wildly different for everyone) what are common goalposts of progress for a writer and how longish might it take to get paid to write for TV?"

Well, first of all, E. Daniels—I think you’re right… the answer is different for everyone. I have friends who got staffed after being an assistant for only a couple years. I also have a friend who spent—literally—NINE YEARS slaving away as a writers assistant and P.A. before finally getting staffed… and this summer—only two years after his first staff job—he sold his first pilot! Then, of course, there’s the story of Caroline Williams, a UCLA grad student who wrote a spec pilot with the sole dream of getting staffed on NBC's The Office… and she not only immediately staffed on The Office, she sold the pilot to ABC, got it made (Miss Guided, which premiered—and was canceled—earlier this year), and just sold ABC another project, Made Over, with a put pilot commitment.

I also have friends who followed the right path and staffed on a TV show… but that show was then canceled, or they were fired, and they never worked again. Some were even high-level writers: producers, co-EP’s, etc. The fact they didn’t work again doesn’t necessarily mean they were bad writers, it just means the road is NEVER easy. Sure, once you get that first staff job (or more accurately, the second), you’re “in,” but you still have to fight and claw to keep working and moving up the ladder. Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry, for instance, had had a fairly successful career in TV (writing and producing shows like The Golden Girls and Five Mrs. Buchanans), but had been out of work for over three years when he finally wrote Desperate Housewives.

(Also, for what it’s worth—some of those friends who never staffed again went on to write other things: video games, screenplays, grants, books, magazine articles, etc. And who knows… they may—and probably will—staff some time in the future.)

Anyway, all of this is to say: YOU ARE RIGHT. The path is different for each person.

Having said that, you’re ALSO right—there are certain goalposts that tend to mark the most common paths. Here’s how the ladder often works, with each step usually taking AT LEAST a year… and usually more…

1)   Intern or runner
2)   Production Assistant (PA)
3)   Writers’ PA
4)   Writers Assistant

So, that’s usually about a four-year path… assuming there are no bumps or setbacks along the way… and there are ALWAYS bumps along the way. Shows get cancelled mid-season. Assistants don’t get promoted. Bosses hire friends. Budgets limit who showrunners can hire.

However, I think there are other goalposts to follow as well… and these aren’t necessarily chronological goalposts. But as you move forward in your career, even if you’re not advancing “up” the ladder, you should be…

1)   Writing more (you should be constantly turning out product: new specs, screenplays, and plays… whatever you need to get noticed)

2)   Getting feedback from writer friends and bosses, learning how to incorporate that feedback, and then seeing your work noticeably improve (I know it sounds elementary, but you should be seeing your writing GETTING BETTER)

3)   Reading more (try to read all the pilots produced each year, on both cable and broadcast networks; this is tough, believe me, but reading not only keeps you informed about what networks are producing, it HELPS YOU BECOME A BETTER
WRITER)

4)   Meeting more writers and showrunners (literally, as you advance, you should see your Rolodex of writer and producer friends growing… not just because you’re meeting more high-level writers, but because friends who are low-level/aspiring writers get promoted)

5)   Meeting more execs and agents (and again, the ones you know should be moving up the ladder, expanding your Rolodex of high-level players)

6)   Getting things produced, published, etc. (As you improve as a writer… and expand your list of contacts… you have more opportunities to get things published or produced. Maybe not on TV… but you can stage plays or sketches, publish stories or scripts, write/produce video games and web content, etc. I used to have a teacher who said “Work begets work,” and he’s right: showrunners and execs like hiring people who are busy and productive… and the more aggressive you are about getting your work out into the world, the higher your chances of having it seen by someone.)

So, E. Daniels, I think both sets of “goalposts” are important. I know people who have been writers assistants for YEARS and wonder why they can’t get staffed… even though they never bother writing specs or reading pilots or going to networking functions.

I also know PA’s who spent every free moment reading scripts, writing stories, and begging their bosses to read their work… and they leapt past their competitors to staff earlier than most people.

Your job is to be moving forward on both fronts, accomplishing both sets of goalposts. You may not progress equally on both fronts at all times… and that’s okay. As long as you can feel yourself progressing.

Anyway, I hope that helps… and please know that you are not alone in this boat. In fact, I’m not sure most writers EVER reach a place where they feel they’ve totally “arrived.” If they did, I think they’d stop writing. I think most great writers—and maybe artists in all mediums—are driven not by a need to “succeed,” but by a need to “be heard”… and the day they feel secure in “being heard” is the day they lose their hunger to create.

So not only should you be doing this because you love the hunt, not the kill, but you should prepare yourself for a lifetime of uncertainty, insecurity, and self-doubt. Which sounds dark and depressing, I know… but those aren’t just the qualities that come with the territory of being a writer… they’re what MAKE us writers. We write BECAUSE we’re uncertain, insecure, and doubtful. It’s a vicious circle: we write to make those things go away, but those are also the very things that MAKE US WRITE.

On that happy note, E. Daniels, look at the bright side… you’re asking the same questions—and having the same concerns—as EVERY WRITER IN HOLLYWOOD, from the top of the food chain to the bottom. So while it seems like you’re wondering if you’ll ever arrive, in one of the most important ways… you already have.

TV Writing Interview: Part III... Take a Listen

Chad — Sat, 15 Nov 2008 00:17:31 GMT

Hey, everyone--

Here's the third part of the 3-part podcast interview I did with Judith Parker Harris and the Alive! Authors Network. Take a listen... we talk about the politics and logistics of being a TV writer, frequent mistakes aspiring writers make, and how to break in and launch a successful career.

Click HERE to check it out!

(And here's Part I and Part II...)

And coming up, we've got some great reader questions... book reviews... and more pitch workshop entries!

MOVIE TALK: Quantum of Solace

Chad — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 23:15:17 GMT

If there’s one thing the new James Bond movie, Quantum of Solace, is not… it’s a good screenwriting lesson.

This isn’t to say it’s not a lot of other things: a collection of (mostly) cool action sequences, a solid attempt to be a genuine sequel to Casino Royale, another stand-out performance from Daniel Craig.

But as far as being a comprehensible story… it falls short. Even moments after seeing the movie, I'm not sure I could've told you what it was about or what happened. Moments are memoriable, but a narrative context in which they make sense? Not so much. ...Which is sad, because I'm not a huge James Bond fan, yet I still think Daniel Craig ROCKS.

In fact, I had to go back and read a couple other reviews just to be able to write this quick synopsis:

The story opens where Casino Royale left off, with Bond and M interrogating Mr. White (Jesper Christenen), the villain they captured at the end of the last movie. Mr. White informs them that he’s part of a secret international conspiracy that does… SOMETHING (I’m still not sure what… just bad stuff, I guess). Before Bond and M have a chance to learn more, the MI6 guards in the room open fire, and we realize Mr. White’s organization is everywhere… including inside MI6.

Using clues found on marked bills, Bond traces Mr. White to an environmental organization called Greene Planet, run by the smarmy Dominic Greene (Mathieu Amalric), who—Bond later learns—is simply using Greene Planet to do something evil. Honestly, I’m still not sure what… but it has something to do with stealing water from poor Bolivians, then selling it back to their dictator, General Medrano (Joaquin Cosio), for ridiculous sums of money.

The events along the way are little more than loosely strung together set pieces… some of which look cool, but most of which do little to further the story. Or rather, if they do—it’s tough to tell how. The story has the illusion of momentum because Bond is DOING stuff—beating people up and killing bad guys—but it’s nearly impossible to track the story from plot point to plot point.

(I.e., at one point, Bond goes on a huge shoot-em-up-boat-chase to rescue Camille [Olga Kurylenko], a gorgeous young woman working for Greene Planet, from being murdered by Greene and Medrano. But after rescuing her, he simply drops her off at a hotel so she can run right back to Greene Planet! HUH? Why? Not only is Bond's motivation completely loopy [What motivation? Why'd he bother rescuing her? Why didn't he question her? Hold her hostage? SOMETHING?], but it renders what could've been a powerful boat chase completely impotent by robbing it of any narrative relevance! Because the scene is ultimately gratuitous, it's also ultimatly meainingless and forgettable.)

I do give the movie props for at least attempting to be a true “emotional” sequel to Casino Royale. The film genuinely tries to pick up the pieces left at the end of the last story: mainly, Bond’s broken heart, shattered by the betrayal and death of Vesper Lynd… and his desire to avenge the attempt on M’s life (Mr. White’s attempt at the beginning of this movie). Unfortunately, aside from a few moments, the story is so incomprehensible the movie never really delivers on its emotional promise.

Having said all this, most of the action sequences are fun to watch… even if the worst of them look a bit fake, and the best of them—like the opening rooftop chase and hand-to-hand fight scene—look like B-roll from The Bourne Ultimatum. (Now, granted—there’s no bigger Bourne Ultimatum fan than me… so I’m very sensitive to things that feel like Bourne ripoffs… and even a Bourne ripoff is more fun to watch than most of the other action scenes out there... and, to be fair, Quantum of Solace is edited by Bourne editor Richard Pearson.)

Ultimately, here’s what you have to realize: Quantum of Solace is not a screenplay. It’s a dance. Literally. A series of beautifully choreographed pieces… with only the thinnest of stories connecting them. But instead of that choreography being wonderful piques and turns and leaps, it’s gun battles, boat chases, and fisticuffs. When the movie is at it’s strongest, it’s when the action is so coolly choreographed you don’t care about the story; when the movie is at its weakest, you’re just hoping it hurries back to the action. (Even though the action scenes sometimes feel a bit derivative, I gotta say—I have NO IDEA how writers write these things. Like in The Bourne Ultimatum, Bond's action scenes are so intricately choreographed, so meticulously planned, I can’t imagine how they can make sense on a page and still convey the kinetic energy of how they’re supposed to look on film.)

So, today’s screenwriting lesson is: a charismatic star and well-done action sequences go an enormously long way in covering up an empty story… but at the end of the day, it’s still a strong, follow-able narrative that leaves audiences really remembering the film.

QUANTUM OF SOLACE TRAILER

Fight for Writers' Rights... THIS WEEKEND! (And hey-- free lunch!)

Chad — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:23:52 GMT

Hey, everyone--

As you know, reality TV writers rarely receive wages or benefits comparable to their scripted counterparts... even though they're writing scripts, shaping arcs and stories, defining characters, punching up jokes, etc.

So this Saturday, the Writers Guild is hosting a lunch event to educate and unite writers of all genres and mediums in the fight for fair and equitable treatment. Here's all the info... help join the fight-- this isn't just about reality TV; it's about fairness for writers everywhere...

The Real Deal: Writers Guild-Covered Reality & Game Shows

Why don’t writers on shows like American Idol, America’s Got Talent, and Survivor receive portable health insurance, pension, proper credits and respect like the writers on Intervention, Dog Whisperer, and Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader? The difference is a Writers Guild of America contract.

Join WGAW President Patric Verrone, writers and producers from some of the top reality and game shows in a lively panel discussion about how writers can win industry-standard benefits. Come learn strategies that could benefit your career as a Hollywood writer. Save the date for this exciting opportunity to network with ‘reality’ and game show professionals!

Panelists include:

• Jim Milio, WGAW members and co-owner of MPH Entertainment (producer of The Dog Whisperer)
• Dan Partland, WGAW member and writer (Intervention)
• Jay Wolpert, WGAW member, screenwriter and game show producer (Pirates of the Caribbean, The Price Is Right)
• Lou DiMaggio, WGAW member and writer (The Weakest Link, The Singing Bee, Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader)

More participants TBA!

Saturday, November 15th
12 PM – 3 PM
Sheraton Universal Hotel
333 Universal Hollywood Drive
Universal City, CA 91608

Lunch and parking will be provided.

This is a non-transferrable invite. Must RSVP to attend.

RSVP: Talbert@wga.org

READER QUESTION: Is Writing TV Commercials a Viable Way to Get Into TV?

Chad — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 22:06:58 GMT

Hey, writers—

Big thanks to Wendy, who sends in today’s reader question! Wendy writes…

“I have been told a TV commercial is a good way to get some writing credits. Is this so, and how would a person go about getting into commercials? --Wendy?”

Well, Wendy, I think writing TV commercials is a great way to get some writing experience… IF YOU WANT TO BE A COMMERCIAL WRITER.

For the most part, showrunners and executives aren’t combing through ranks of commercial writers searching for the next great TV writer to join the staff of The Mentalist or My Name is Earl or Mad Men or The Colbert Report or Sons of Anarchy. Writing TV commercials is a different craft than writing TV shows, and while execs and producers definitely want fresh voices, they also want fresh voices that can write TV shows.

Personally, I’m of the belief that if you want a certain job, you should laser-focus and go for that job. If you wanted to be a NASCAR driver, you wouldn’t do it by first becoming a mechanic. You would get a car, get on the track, and learn to race. And while you’d also learn all you could about automobile mechanics, you’d dive into the specific training it takes to become what you actually want to be: a real driver.

Sometimes I hear people offer TV writers advice like, “You have a better chance of breaking in if you first become a lawyer, because there are tons of law shows, and showrunners always seem to be looking for lawyers.” While there may be some truth in this, it’s also misleading advice. Showrunners do like to hire lawyers—especially on law shows—but telling someone to become a lawyer first… or any other profession… is sending them down a long, risky, circuitous path.

The truth is: showrunners and execs want talented writers who understand the medium of television and have real-world/life experience to help inform their writing. So yes—experience as a lawyer can be helpful and attractive. But so can experience as a fireman. Or a marriage counselor. Or a spy. Or a plumber. Or a stay-at-home mom. The is key taking the real-world experience you have and being able to translate it into powerful stories and writing. But I certainly would never say that certain professions—whether ad-writers, lawyers, or airline pilots—are funnels to the TV world. If you wanna be a TV writer… go learn how to be a TV writer.

Having said that… showrunners and executives also like hiring writers with produced credits. Produced credits suggest someone else—someone acting as a “filter”—read a writer’s work, liked it, and got it made. They also suggest the writer has a certain level of professionalism, or at least understands some of the processes of translating words from mere thoughts to actual out-there-in-the-world products. Produced credits suggest, in theory, a writer knows how to take notes, collaborate, rewrite to accommodate practical elements (time, money, space), etc. And in the world of television, where time, resource, and budget constraints constantly force writers to change stories, characters, and scenes, these are important skills and experiences to have.

Produced credits could include plays, movies, published novels, articles, short stories… and yes—probably even TV commercials, especially if they were particularly creative and/or well-known. A showrunner hiring for a sentimental melodrama (say, Seventh Heaven) may be very impressed with a writer who has written a successful series of touching Hallmark card commercials. An executive looking for writers for a raunchy new sketch show may be impressed by someone who’s written a bunch of hilarious Bud Light commercials. I’m not saying they actually seek out and scour these places for new writers… and I’m definitely not saying the best way to impress a producer or exec is to go out and write commercials… but I am saying that commercial-writers who have creative, successful commercials under their belt may be attractive to certain showrunners searching for specific and appropriate voices.

There have also been a few rare instances where TV ad campaigns have literally been turned into actual TV shows. The most recent of these was last year’s ABC flop, Cavemen, which was based on a series of Geico ads created by the Martin Agency, an ad agency in Richmond, Virginia. Joe Lawson, the ad copywriter who wrote the original spots, even got to write the script for Cavemen’s pilot episode. Likewise, in 2002, CBS developed a TV series based on “Baby Bob,” a talking baby who had appeared in a series of freeinternet.com commercials.

However… these instances are few and far between (not to mention, they rarely work). I don’t think it’s fair to say that a commercial writer who creates a brilliant ad campaign has any better of a chance of turning it into a TV show than someone who writes a great short film… or a terrific autobiographical memoir… or a wonderful stage musical… or anything else that catches Hollywood's eye.

So to sum up this rambling answer, Wendy… if your goal is to be a TV writer, my advice is to go be a TV writer. Don’t waste time taking circuitous paths as an ad-writer or a janitor or a doctor or a military commander because you think it’ll somehow “backdoor” you into the industry. GO GET A JOB IN TELEVISION. Get as close to the action and the writing process as you can. Become a writers assistant… or a P.A…. or a script supervisor… or a runner. Start wherever you need to start to begin learning the process and making contacts.

BUT… if you’re not in L.A. or you can’t yet get that first job, by all means—keep writing. Write the best pieces you can and get them out there into the world… poems, plays, skits, magazine articles, online shorts… or—if you want to—TV commercials. Whatever best shows off your unique talent and voice.

As for actually getting into writing TV commercials, if you really want to pursue it, I would begin by researching ad agencies in your area, then contacting them about job opportunities. Most probably won't hire you as a bona fide writer right off the bat, but you can begin as a desk assistant, or a production assistant, or even a receptionist. This will allow you to meet the players, learn the process, interact with clients, and understand exactly how TV commercials are conceived, written, and produced.

Do a good job, make friends with your co-workers, please the clients, and eventually you'll feel comfortable enough to ask for more responsibility and let the higher-ups know your aspirations. Again, you probably won't leap right from assistant to writer, but perhaps your boss will let you help write a few spots... or rewrite a few lines... or pitch an idea... or something that will allow you to begin showing off your writing chops. Eventually, you'll impress people enough that you will move up the ladder and begin writing your own spots.

Hope that helps, Wendy!... and for the rest of you who may have questions about TV, film, writing, agents, or anything else… please feel free to email me at WDScriptNotes@FWPubs.com. Have a good weekend!

P.S. If you haven't seen them, here's a compilation of Geico's caveman commercials...

GEICO'S CAVEMAN COMMERCIALS

Best Book Recommendation EVER!

Chad — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 22:00:31 GMT

Hey, everyone--

I'm super-psyched to announce that my new (and first) book, Small Screen, Big Picture: A Writer's Guide to the TV Business (which officially comes out November 25), is now available for pre-order on Amazon, Borders, and Barnes & Noble!

The book is a user-friendly "business guide" for aspiring TV writers. It explains the differences between networks, studios, and production companies... how TV series make money... the new show development and production process... and how all this affects the creative process. It then talks about what happens in a writers room... how to break in and get your first writing job... and how to survive once you're there.

It also features interviews with almost 200 working TV professionals... network and studio executives from almost every network and studio (NBC, ABC, FOX, the CW, TNT, Comedy Central, E!, you name it)... showrunners, writers, and producers from all your favorite shows (Lost, Psych, Dexter, Life, Army Wives, Alias, Prison Break, Buffy, 24... and more)... and agents from Hollywood's top TV agencies (UTA, ICM, APA, Gersh, etc.).

Now, granted, I’m biased, but if you’re an aspiring TV writer… or even just love television and learning how it works… I think/hope this is a really helpful, important book. Most books focus on the creative aspects of being a TV writer: how to write comedy, how to structure a pilot, how to pitch a show, etc. Small Screen, Big Picture looks at these things… but from a business perspective: what executives really want, how to design a show that will be profitable for its studio, what agents need to get you work, etc.

So please… take a look… and lemme know what you think!

PITCH WORKSHOP: Entry #7 Feedback

Chad — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 01:01:23 GMT

Hey, folks—

Today’s Pitch Workshop entry comes from Mary S., who sends in a logline for her feature romantic comedy. Take a look…

First of all—Mary, thank you so much for sending this in! Secondly, thanks to everyone who has already offered Mary their feedback and criticism… I hope it was helpful, Mary… and feel free to keep it coming!

And now, here’s Mary’s logline…

"In the feature length romantic comedy, American Breakfast, a bi-cultural young Latino flees an unjust U.S. sentence and clears away the wreckage of his irresponsible past in a quirky coastal Mexican village where he finds love, acceptance and a new life."

And here are my thoughts…

WHAT I LIKE:
I think you’re starting from a great place, Mary, because your story has a wonderfully strong emotional arc. Stories about redemption can be incredibly powerful, and American Breakfast is very acutely about redemption. I think you’ve also done a nice job of setting up two different worlds to reflect your hero’s emotional journey; he travels from an unjust U.S. to an accepting Mexican village… just as he travels from irresponsibility to maturity—so some important touchstones of your story are already in place.

WHAT I’D WORK ON:
You’ve gotten some good feedback from readers so far… I think everyone’s dead-on when they say the logline needs more details. First of all, what’s the main character’s name? Giving him a name will help us humanize and relate to him. But even beyond that—it’d be nice to have some details to help illuminate the interesting parts of the logline. What was his unjust U.S. sentence (murder, robbery, terrorism, etc.)? Why was his past irresponsible… did he have a child out of wedlock? Leave his wife? Abandon his starving family? How does he flee the U.S.? Does he run away and escape? Does he serve his unjust sentence and bolt? Some fleshing out of these vague areas will help give the story the specificity it needs to come to life.

Having said that…

For me, there are two looming holes which beg the biggest questions…

HOLE #1: You say this is a romantic comedy, but—put most simply—WHERE'S THE ROMANCE?! Romantic comedies are never about just one person, they’re about a relationship… Harold and Maude’s May/December romance (Harold & Maude), Harry and Sally’s friendship (When Harry Met Sally), Ben and Alison’s fears and frustrations facing parenthood (Knocked Up). You wouldn’t pitch any of those movies by describing just one person… you’d illustrate each of those relationships, bringing it to life so your audience could understand it and—hopefully—see some reflection of their own life in it. So I’m not even sure it’s POSSIBLE to pitch a romantic comedy where the logline focuses on something other than the dynamic between two characters. Unfortunately, the American Breakfast logline doesn’t even MENTION another character—so I’m not sure how this is a romantic comedy at all. (That doesn’t mean it’s NOT a romantic comedy. Perhaps the logline needs to be revamped to focus on the romantic relationship at the core of the story, or perhaps it’s just mislabeled and it’s not a romantic comedy after all.)

Refocusing the logline on a relationship doesn’t mean you have to ditch the themes of redemption and justice you want to explore… it just means you need to study them through the lens of your story’s particular romance. Here, for instance, are a couple sample loglines that tell a similar story… but through a more romantic lens:

• When Mexican-American Carlos is framed for murder in Los Angeles, his only hope of escape is to entrust his life to an impulsive—and gorgeous—female bounty hunter who offers to return him to his Mexican village… as long as he will father her child.

• When Carlos, a petty pick-pocket, decides to hide out in a Mexican village to escape an unjust robbery sentence, he hopes to live under the radar forever… until Penelope, a headstrong political lobbyist, mistakes him for an old ‘60’s activist and convinces him to join her campaign.

I’m not saying either of those is good—or the story you want to tell—I’m just saying they each focus on a romance… you can see where the comedy will come from… and they don’t completely sacrifice the spirit or themes of the original.

(Having said that, maybe your script ISN’T ultimately meant to be a romantic-comedy—it’s just mislabeled—in which case I’d just remove the label.)

HOLE #2: I think the other big missing chunk here is… WE NEED TO MORE INFO ABOUT THE VILLAGE HE’S GOING TO. I know I say this a lot, but all stories—at their core—are about RELATIONSHIPS, RELATIONSHIPS, RELATIONSHIPS… and if American Breakfast isn’t a traditional romantic comedy about a relationship between two people, it’s CERTAINLY about a relationship between your hero and this village.

For me, there are two ways to go with this, and while neither is better or worse, each path makes it a very different story. So is this village… A) your hero’s hometown, or is it B) a totally new place? Here’s the difference…

If the village is your hero’s hometown (like in Beautiful Girls or Ed), he’s returning to a place full of history and “ghosts,” where he already has relationships… and probably damaged relationships he never wanted to return to. American Breakfast then becomes a redemption story about a guy returning home to repair broken pieces of the life he’d left behind.

But if the village is a totally new place (like in Doc Hollywood, Northern Exposure, or Cars), it becomes a world that opens your hero’s eyes to new people, relationships, and opportunities. Only in this new land can he shed his “irresponsible” past and become the man he’s always wanted to be. In this case, American Breakfast becomes a redemption story about an outsider who—thanks to the magic of this special village—washes away the sins of his past to become a whole new person.

Neither of these story-paths is better than the other… but I think choosing one (or another one that I’m not thinking of right now) will help fill out your particular movie and help us understand your main character’s journey. (I’m also guessing you may know—somewhere in your head—exactly which village it is… it’s just not articulated in the logline. But if not… think about it; it’s an important question.)

Anyway, Mary—you’re off to a great start, and I hope this feedback is helpful!

Everyone else—if you have a logline or short synopsis you’d like to submit to the Script Notes Pitch Workshop, feel free to post it in any of the comments sections… or email it to WDScriptNotes@FWPubs.com. You can also email me with thoughts, suggestions, or questions about writing, the industry, or anything else!

In the mean time, keep reading… we’ve got some cool stuff coming up: book reviews, movie reviews, reader questions, and more pitch submissions!

TV Writing Interview: Part II... Take a Listen!

Chad — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 00:23:02 GMT

Hey, everyone--

A couple weeks ago, the Alive! Authors Network posted the first part of Breaking In and Breaking Through the TV Business, Judith Parker Harris's 3-part interview with me about TV writing... how to get your foot in the door, get noticed, and excel in the world of television.

Well, Judith has now posted Part II... so please CLICK HERE take a listen to the next installment, and lemme know what you think!

In the mean time, have a great weekend... enjoy your extra hour... and Part III will be up soon!

Help American Idol Writers Fight for Fair Wages and Equal Rights!

Chad — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 19:29:45 GMT

Hey, writers--

We've talked a lot here about reality TV writers' fight for fair pay and equitable treatment. Reality writers are often paid less-than-minimum wages, work illegally long hours, and rarely get breaks or meals... yet they're writing jokes, breaking stories, and crafting scenes just like writers on The Tonight Show or The Simpsons or CSI or The Colbert Report.

The Writers Guild is at the forefront of the fight for reality writers' rights, and their main target right now is Fremantle, the production company that owns and produces American Idol, one of the most powerful, profitable shows in the history of television.

Well, here's an easy, painless, two-second way for everyone to get involved...

Please CLICK HERE head to American Rights at Work and sign a letter to the American Idol producers showing your support. You can then forward the letter to you friends... and help demand Fremantle treat their workers fairly.

Also, here's a video from the kickoff of the WGA's American Idol Truth Tour...